Friday, April 17, 2009

Identity Crisis

Hi - I have to share something. I'm having an identity crisis.

See, I entered this blog contest (actually, you guys nominated me, but I solicited the nominations) called The Mother of All Bloggers. Cute name, right? And after getting nominated, I started thinking about it.

I've never actually labeled myself, or my blog. I just kind of write about where I am at the time I sit down in front of this keyboard. On rare occasions, I've had something extra to talk about (like the Mentoring Project), but usually, I don't edit myself overmuch.

Entering this contest has caused me to be tempted to want to win this contest. This led to me "checking out the competition", and reading some really neat blogs. The thing of it is is, first of all, we are all different types of bloggers. There are some mom blogs that are funny accounts of daily life being a mom (and let's face it, there's TONS of material) They had me rolling! There are some that focus on stuff like finding bargains and give-aways (neat concept, actually didn't know they were out there). There are "Christian" mommy bloggers, mommy book reviewer bloggers, mommy travel bloggers...

You get my drift? There's a whole world of mommy bloggers previously undiscovered by moi.

Me, I don't know where I fit in. I had to provide three categories for my blog to sign up for the Facebook Network app for blogs. I was seriously hard-pressed to narrow it down to three.

My writing comes from a pretty broad place. I'm an "empty-nester", I could write reams about how that's shaping up in my life - yet I'm still parenting three boys. I have special needs children, there are multiple facets to that experience - from the daily realities of meds, doctors, equipment, therapies, etc. to how it feels to sit beside your six year-old's hospital bed and tell God, "It's okay, you can take him now".

I'm a single parent - have been for twenty years - I remember the early years when it was just me and my two "original" children. How freakin' scary that was, how much I needed God because He really was all we had. I also am living that life now, with all that time under my belt, knowing you actually can have a son turn out pretty awesome without a dad, and a beautiful, well-adjusted nineteen year old daughter who doesn't hate you. Yet, I'm still raising this batch alone...

I'm a Christian. Struggling and fighting for my relationship with Jesus. Trying to keep it real and honest between Him and me, and bring my heart right.

I'm a daughter. Abandoned, adopted, alone.

I'm a foster parent, and adoptive mom.

I'm a woman. I frequently deny that part of me, but it's pretty much a done deal. I get lonely, I'd love to be wanted.

So, to try to narrow all that stuff down and laser-beam my ramblings in this blog...don't think I can. I write from my heart, and I hope what you read is helpful, or moves you in some fashion. That it benefits you, my readers, and that you find encouragement or hope, or just recognize that you are not alone in how you may be feeling.

I apologize in advance for not being easily categorized. Maybe I won't win any contests, but I will always be real about where I am. And I truly, truly hope that works for you.

Much love,

K

5 comments:

  1. Thank you, Allen - I like your shirt!

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  2. K: as your competitor in the contest (!) I probably shouldn't be offering advice but I say change the name of this post to "My Mom Logic" and you're done! This is a very cool post & I love your 'real.'
    :) all best,
    marymac

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  3. I like your writing voice. : )

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  4. LilMissSunshine YetLuv'sSeattle'sRain11:06 AM

    When I was little I was in a foster home... one day I was out with the foster mom doing grocery shopping... I received a dollar the previous day from a coloring contest at the daycare I was at... outside the grocery store was a homeless man asking for money... I was about to give him the dollar I had... remembering the tough times I and my birth family went through... the foster mom had a fit... couldn't comprehend why I would do such a thing... as the stereotypical saying goes " homeless people are lazy" "they just need to get off the butts and get a job"... let just say I didn't last too long in that home...

    Mumsie thank you for re-jogging my memory... we CAN help the less fortunate... we CAN help! I loved last Sunday's sermon too! It is amazing just reading your blogs and how it ties into those "AMAZING" sermons.... The Lord has given you the gift of speech... I am not so sure on mine though... I am not sure if I am a walker or a talker... or even both!

    Also yes I did read Matthew 6:33... I am trying hard to stay optimistic especially with today's weather... and yes all I can do is trust in the Lord and worry about today... tomorrow is tomorrow and no I don't know what will happen... Right now yes I will live in the present... I also believe this verse refers to the past also!

    Thank you mom I love you, you honestly are the coolest person I know!

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